Supuration - Vertigo (May)

Now, iknow I am lost
My days are numbered, not powered
It seems that my actions are clear
Abdicating to fate at what cost ?
The gun in one hand
My diary in the other.
I am writing the words from my head
There will be few more, eyes are closed
I feel free, now I have chosen;
The humanity in me near dead
Foetus : "... that still be me !! ..."
I am safe in this sphere
No pain in here...
With eyes tight shut
i can see, sixteen years ago
mother being just like me !
Not alone anymore
Free from pain of the past
The suffering over
These thoughts in the ind of the last...
I follow orders, now I move to the light
From which I had fled for so long
I follow his orders, ideas, sensations
She : "to keep us always together..."
Thereis nothing of me.
Is there trial, judge and jury
Beyond the now temporal
I do not intend to stay here.