I'll Get By - Worrying

Wondering
Worrying
How much pressure can I endure
I never knew why I’ve been like this but I never found a cure
For this awful insecurity that keeps interfering me
Keeping me away from being happy

Always comparing myself with everyone else leaves me thinking I’m not good enough
So I stay silent drown in my own misery
Make myself believe that my presence isn’t worth anything, cause I am nothing

For so many years I got told that eventually, I would change
That this insecurity would always stay but I would learn how to cope with it
And I would learn how to hide it and get stronger as I grow older
So I lived and continued with this mindset that everything would be okay.

But why haven’t I changed yet
Why do I still feel the same
Why does this thought of being a failure always linger in my mind
Son, you are beautiful as you are
Mother, last December I’ve turned 22
And I’m ashamed to say I still can’t believe you

Teach me how to love
I want to love myself, I want to be there for you and everyone else
I want to get rid of my doubts, I want to change, I need your help
Teach me how to fucking love myself

Wondering
Worrying
How much pressure can I endure

I never knew why I’ve been like this but I never found a cure
For this awful insecurity that keeps interfering me
Keeping me away from being happy

Always unhappy

Always comparing myself with everyone else leaves me thinking I’m not good enough
So I stay silent, drown in my own misery
Make myself believe that my presence isn’t worth anything cause I am nothing