Epic Rap Battles Of History - Charlemagne VS Napoleon

Intro
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
CHARLEMAGNE!
VS!
NAPOLEON!
BEGIN!

Charlemagne's 1st verse
Who's the Europe-conquering king par exellance,
Who fathered his own renaissance and gave birth to fonts?
It is I, Charles the Great! Son of Pepin the Short, torturin'
This overblown war-horny bicorne-sporting Corsican!
The Pope's eyes? (Saved 'em!) Holy Roman Empire? (Established it!)
It lasted a thousand years, until you pranced up and savaged it!
Egypt, Haiti, Spain,
Your campains are too elaborate!
Your bubble of an empire popped like an ABBA hit! (ha!)
I strike the fear of God and every land I take
Leavin' pagans quakin' makin' em do the Charlem-shake!
The bloody verdict of this battle has already been decided
Like the love between you and Joséphine it's one-sided!

Napoleon's 1st verse
Oh, Charlemagne, you cringe Carolingian charlatan
I'm the genuine article military artisan!
You're clanky old suit of armor!
I'll bombard the janky monarch of the Franks and the Lombards!
Your joyous sword tore hordes asunder!
But war's a bit more hardcore now that the year have four numbers!
That is canister shot and you'll recieve those balls
When I blast you with my 12-pounder Gribeauvals!
Le Petit Corporal! Here to get my groove on!
Even if I lose I come back and get my coup on!
I'll subdue you brutally like a royalistin Toulon!
I'm the smoothest French thing in grey since Poupon!

Charlemagne's 2nd verse
Oh, that flow!
You can't quite rock it!
That must be why you keep your hand like that - no pocket!
You're nothing but a whiny little egoistic swine!
You got sunk by a Brit with a bullet in his spine!...
And your Russian debacle was even worse!
You got beat by lice!
You should've enlisten an elementary school nurse!
People still place my name next to God - CHARLEMAGNE!
Now pretend I'm Moscow AND RETREAT FROM THESE FLAMES!

Napoleon's 2nd verse
I kept a vial of posion around my neck in case of capture
And I almost just drank it!
YOU ARE THAT BAD OF A RAPPER!
I'll outflank you with ease! Your losses will be costly!
Like the Alps in winter with your pregnant wife you shouldn't cross me! (UGH!)
When I conquer I don't need a pope's help!
I'll grip a diamond-dripped hilt and put your crown on myself!
The only throne you belong on is the latrine!
You might be King of the Franks BUT YOU CAN SUCK BEANS!

WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP- (uhm) BATTLES OF HISTORYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYyyyyyyyyyyyyy...