Bo Burnham - Microwave Popcorn

[Intro]
Could you turn my headphones? Turn up my head--or
I'm the only one in here, so, I'm gonna turn up my own headphones
For myself, thank you, you're welcome

[Chorus]
Tryna make microwave popcorn
In a microwave
I am on that wave
I am on that wave
Tryna make microwave popcorn

[Verse 1]
I take the packet out the plastic (Takin' out the plastic, brrt)
Reading the directions on the back of the package (Ooh)
Orville Redenbacher, you're a savage (You a savage)
So let's get crackin' (Tryna make microwave, ayy)
I put the packet on the glass (What glass?)
The little glass dish in the microwave (Got it)
I close the door (Which door?)
The door to the microwave! What is wrong with you?!
You follow all the rules when you're a studious guy (Step one)
Insert the packet, set the power to high
Cook for one and a half minutes to two and a half minutes (Mm, kind of a wide range)

[Chorus]
Tryna make microwave popcorn (Bippity bippity bop)
In a microwave (Brrt)
I am on that wave
I am on that wave
Tryna make microwave popcorn

[Verse 2]
The popcorn's done (Thank God!)
I open up the door, I take it out
Ooh, ah, chhh, goddamn, that's hot (Super hot!)
Makes sense (I burnt my fingies)
I open up the packet (The packet)
It smells smoky and the kernels are black, shit (No!)
I burned it (No!), I burned it (For real?)
Yes, for real-- Do you think you're helping by saying all this? (Tryna make microwave)
I'm givin' up (I'm done cookin' popcorn)
I'ma eat a bag of Skinny Pop (It's already popped!)
I look back at the microwave, wait a minute
How'd I miss this button? There's a button and the button says

[Chorus]
"Popcorn" (Oh, no!)
On the microwave (There was a button that said popcorn?!)
I am on that wave
I am on that wave (I shoulda hit that button) (Brrt)
Tryna make microwave popcorn (Tryna, make, micro, wave) (Bippity bippity bop) (Jiffy Pop)
In a microwave (Guys, stop) (Tryna, make, micro, wave) (Agh, got a kernel in my throat, aghhh) (Brrt)
I am on that wave (Guys, get off--) (Tryna, make, micro, wave) (Brrt, brrt)
I am on that wave (Everyone's talking at the same time; can everyone just shut— Shut— Shut up!) (...Christmas ornaments) (Movie theater butter)
Tryna make microwave popcorn